My Point of Heu |
8/31/2021 I am Normal Without ReconstructionSo I met a man who is currently taking care of his wife whom underwent a mastectomy recently... The exchange has upset me and I will tell you why. She opted to get reconstruction, which is your choice and is perfectly fine. For those who know me I had a preventative mastectomy without reconstruction... I just opted to go flat and not get implants or any other modifications. These are the choices that we make and ultimately you hope it is the best decision for you. Now what upset me was he started quoting to me the same things the doctors told me about getting reconstruction and encouraging implants. Words like: they were unhappy after going flat, they didn't like it, stats show most women won't like how they look and etc. I knew in my heart that I was going to be ok with not having any breasts and I didn't need anyone to convince me otherwise. What upsets me about this entire thing is people are perpetuating the concept that you need to be status quo or have breasts to feel normal. Here was a guy who was looking at me 2 year post-op (by the way I don't have any breasts or nipples) telling me that having a mastectomy without getting breast reconstruction was going to make me not like it, regret it and so on. No one seems to advocate for this option. I had to fight for it and was referred to several plastic surgeons to try and convince me otherwise. I did not want to spend many months having parts of my body inflated and have another surgery so I could have implants put in or spend 15 hours in surgery having parts of my body taken from one place and put in another. He even said that his wife spoke to other women about their experience and what it was like having the surgery and then having implants, which I did too. It seemed so problematic and no one was really happy with their results after the first try. But I haven't been put on a list for people to talk to when considering going flat... why don't they advocate for those who want to just be free and not have any more surgeries or problems. Why the need to try and convince me of what other people think is right? I feel offended most of the time because people think I had cancer, when my surgery was aimed to prevent the disease... now I am made to feel as if what I did was not right, not the best choice and not normal? I am free, flat and fabulous and no one ever notices I don't have boobs!!! |
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